road trip!

It's true, tomorrow we embark on a road trip- roughly, a 3,000 mile long road trip across the great United States of America.

My dearest Kaley is moving to San Diego and I get to drive from here to there with her. I am pretty pumped about our road trip. I can't even begin to imagine what it is like to drive for 5 days (stops in between, of course) or what it will be like to drive clear across the desert, that is, New Mexico. Ben and I were watching TV tonight and a commercial for Subaru came on. This couple was driving and all that was around them was dust, desert dust and tumbleweed. I looked at Ben and asked "is that real?" When you grow up near a bay and live in a state that's so small, Texas could eat it for dinner, you don't really understand what it means to be "in the middle of nowhere". I think on this trip I will come to understand this.

On one hand I am nervous. We are women and we are driving... across the country. On the other hand I am SO excited.

I am excited to spend this time with Kaley-- I am so thankful to get to postpone our "goodbye" another week. I am excited to share the experience of seeing the Grand Canyon with her. She says she could care less-- I say I will make a believer out of her! (I am not really sure what I mean by that... maybe that I will help her to believe that the wonders of the world really are wonderful?) I am excited to bring out every bad pop song that we listened to in college. Ashlee Simpson? Yes, I think so. I am excited to give McDonalds one more chance (okay, that's not true, but for Kaley I will eat McDonalds). I am excited to see Nashville and Amarillo, Texas. I can only hope to find the world's largest cup of frozen yogurt or giant ball of yarn- whatever. I am excited to drive in the south where it's warmer. I am excited to see Las Vegas and compare it with my last visit when I was just 11 years old (a different perspective,

maybe?) And I am excited (in a bittersweet way) to see Cali- the state Nick and Kaley will call home.

If you think of us, pray for a safe trip. And I know I will have lots of pictures and stories to share when I get back. Until then, I don't know how much of this blog I will see. Can you even get WiFi in the desert? hmmm... anyway, farewell friends! See you soon!

the fruits of my labor

You may remember this summer when I shared the beginnings of my first vegetable garden. My neighbor Beth and I (and some help from our husbands) tilled, built a fence, planted, weeded, waited...

and finally got some real homegrown vegetables! Some said the deer would jump right into our little garden and have a feast. Even still, Beth and I crossed our fingers and sprinkled a little Irish Springs soap around and hoped for the best.

For the most part, we actually grew things and even got to pick and eat our veggies! Delicious veggies that we watched ripen as the weeks went by.

I will be honest, we had our fair share of green tomatoes that turned brown before they turned red, misshapen green peppers, and I have an eggplant plant that refuses to do anything. BUT! We grew lots of things, and the deer never bothered any of it. I do, however, think that in late September some mangey animal (a squirrel probably) discovered our garden and nibbled on some of our zucchini. They never bothered the hot peppers-- but I lost many a zucchini to those dumb gray animals.

Anyway, I think for a first attempt we didn't do half bad. And to be honest after our planting season was over I didn't do a lot of garden maintenance. Maybe next year with some more tending we will have a more abundant garden! And a better plan to keep out all mangey animals...

fall leaves

I was cleaning over at camp today, dusting a windowsill in one of the dorms that overlooks the water. I stopped for a minute to think-- I am so thankful.

Then I thought, all of those beautiful fall leaves are just those colors because they are dying, and will soon fall off the trees! But for now, I will be thankful for the picture God painted for me today!

lately...

We carved more pumpkins. I totally traced my cat design.

Ben carved a pumpkin with a picture of himself, carving a pumpkin.

Karl was a no-show at this pumpkin carving party... which is too bad. First Sarah Palin-- who knows what would have been next!

I bought a little white cabinet at Target. I had all these baskets on my bedroom floor and now, they can live in this cabinet! I thought it was a bit blah, however... so I visited the most delicious store, Anthropologie and purchased this tiny knob. My Pièce de résistance perhaps?

Thanks to Kaley I can't get enough of this guy's music. You should listen!

Speaking of Kaley- her move gets closer and closer by the day (obviously), so we threw her a Harry Potter themed farewell party. A success, I'd say!

I'm posting another picture of her, because I miss having this little red dog around (she came to visit last week) even if it did really irritate me that she kept sleeping on my throw pillows.

on sleep

I love to sleep. Who doesn't love a good rest, really? I love my bed, but I even love to sleep in cars. And I do it, always. When Ben is driving I almost always fall asleep- driving home from church is one of my favorite napping times. When I am with other people I try really hard to not fall asleep. Sometimes I just can't help it. I catch my head bobbing forward like I have no control over it! When I was a little girl my dad had a diesel truck- in that thing, forget it, I went right to sleep every time.

As much as I love sleep, I don't go to bed early. I have always been a late night person more than an early morning person. Early to bed, early to rise hasn't really applied to me either- I am just happier when I get to sleep in, at least a little. More often than not I just stay up really late and don't really sleep in. I do, however "sleep in" according to what my husband thinks.

One of the great challenges of our marriage is sleep. He wakes up on a daily basis around 5am. I do not. On weekdays I want to stay up late because I am not tired, and on weekends Ben doesn't want to sleep in to enjoy a lazy Saturday. Often I will stay up watching a movie and Ben will be on the other couch fast asleep starting around 9pm. If I am having an exceptionally crazy bout of insomnia I will stay up staring at this computer screen until some ridiculous hour when my eyes get weary. You know, things have improved since we got a desktop computer. When we were first married I would quietly crawl into bed next to my husband, and then, with no warning, I would open the laptop and this light would blare on sleeping Ben. Sometimes he would look at me like I was crazy, sometimes he rolled over and barely noticed-- but he never complained. I wanted to sleep! I just couldn't... yet. Then I would finally fall asleep and not want to wake up the next morning until 10:00.

I feel, however, that as a grown woman I need to wake up at a grown-up time. It varies when I really need to get up though- If I am substitute teaching I get up at 6:30 and if I am working at camp I really don't need to get up until 8, sometimes 8:30 (unless it's a weekend and we start work at 7am... see, it's crazy!). Anyway, I always set my alarm for 7:00 on days when I don't have anything, just to feel a little more "grown-up".

As it is, I really do love sleeping. It may be more effective if I had a consistent pattern but I don't think it is in the cards for me. Maybe if someday I have a job that doesn't change day to day- maybe then I will get into the routine, or if we have children (in the far and distant future) I hear that children don't really allow you to pick your own pattern of sleep!... ugh... I think I need a nap...

carving pumpkins

It is the perfect time of year for carving pumpkins. I don't always take part in this tradition-- sometimes scooping the insides out of a pumpkin seems a little like de-braining a living thing. I don't know, it's the same feeling I get when trying to cook spaghetti squash. Anyway, we carved pumpkins this year and ate lots of yummy fall snacks. Once I got past the stringy innards I really enjoyed it.

Clare even helped.

I would like to say the creative juices flowed from me, but I just did a (very abstract) tree on my white pumpkin. This year I chose a white pumpkin because it just looked so strange and beautiful amongst the normal orange pumpkins. Val did a beautiful Martha-inspired pumpkin, Andrew a more traditional jack-o-lantern, and Ben pulled off a lovely sailboat design.

And then, there was Karl-- who seemed to just be making a mess over in his corner of the table. The finished product, I think was remarkably impressive...

Can you tell who it is?

race for the cure

We went for it again this year- We woke up this morning well before the sun and headed to the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure. On our drive, we noticed quite a few cars with a dusting of snow on them. I will be honest, the "wintery mix" of the morning was less than motivating. I was excited about doing the race despite the chilly and rainy weather. Kristi wanted to run with us this year too. I am so inspired by the thousands of people that want to help in some small way to find a cure for cancer. Though that was inspiring, I felt totally unprepared. Last year I was determined to run at least three times a week, every week, in preparation for the race. This year, I. did. not. care. Cancer couldn't fool me- it didn't care whether I ran or walked... so I was pretty content on walk/running the 5k.

The race started and we picked up a decent jog. I felt good for the first mile but then my muscles got a little tight (and so itchy!!) but I was not going to be the first to say I wanted to walk. Not to mention, I think my body just kept going because running made me a lot warmer that walking, which was great. Kristi was ahead of me pretty much the entire time and looked like she was jogging on a fluffy cloud. Ben, well he ran ahead and took pictures and talked the entire time like it was no thing. And so it was, I couldn't give up, so I ran the entire 5k (while looking like a ridiculous person I'm sure, struggling over every hill) but I am glad I did it. I enjoyed it, mostly.

You can kind of see me in the background here running behind Kristi. The amount my right foot is off the ground was just about how my stride looked on that last mile.

Alyce even came to cheer us on, which was great.

I must confess, just going from straight nothing into running 3 miles makes for a very sore body later in the day. I think I broke my left foot. Okay, of course I didn't, but it really is killing me! Here's to the comfort of my bed tonight!

You know, there is an option to "Sleep in for the Cure" on the race website. You can actually pledge your donation and get a t-shirt but not actually do anything. Pathetic? or Genius?

October 16th

As a girl I grew up spending a lot of time at the cemetery. My aunt would take me, sometimes on important dates, and sometimes just because, to say "hi" to my mom. I remember for most of my life we would visit mom with purple flowers and stale bread in tow. The flowers were her favorite color and the bread was for the ducks who lived at the pond. Most of my memories of the cemetery revolve around my concern for the ducks and my disappointment any time they were nowhere to be found. I did quite a bit of wandering too, asking my aunt questions about the headstones nearby my mom's. I would look at the names and dates, sometimes asking her how old that person was when they died. And then there is that hill, that (seemingly) gigantic hill that I would run up and down, and up and down until I was completely exhausted. Then, we would drive home, my aunt and I, and my life didn't seem much different.

When I was just weeks away from my 4th birthday and my mom died, I didn't grieve in the same way that all those around me grieved, but I did get it. I walked through my tiny life wondering what my mommy was like and wishing I could be with her. But before I could think too much on it, I am sure the latest Cabbage Patch Kid or Disney movie distracted me.

As I have gotten older, I have gone to the cemetery less. It is harder now, even though the time of her death continually gets farther away. It is harder now I think, because I look at pictures and hold on to things that belonged to her and I have no memories of her. I have memories that I think I almost "dream" of based on stories I have been told about her. I still sometimes ask my aunt about her and find there is so much I don't know. I find I struggle with the simple fact that though I am her only daughter, I feel that of everyone who was part of her life I know her the least.

But-- I love what I know of her because of my aunt and so many others that share with me beautiful stories about her.

Because of others, I know my mom. I know that she always held her hands in a particular way that seemed very poised. I know that I look like her in some ways. I know that she loved the Lord. I know that she had great taste in music. I know that she loved to write and was creative. I know that she was a kind and graceful woman. I know that she was always polite. I know that she had a lot of love to give to a lot of people, and I know that she loved me.

Today, is my mother's birthday. It is one of those dates that has always stuck with me. It was a day that we visited the cemetery, but in some ways this date is different. Christmas and Thanksgiving, and even Mother's Day are just filled with these wonderful memories of the amazing family God has given me. But her birthday, in my mind, was just an empty day-- because she is not here to celebrate or be celebrated.

What an awful sentiment! To that, I say, no thank you! Her birthday is so perfect, I think, in the month of October- because it is Breast Cancer Awareness month. So many new developments in cancer research have been made since my mom died of breast cancer, and her birthday falls right in the month where America is encouraged to buy, buy, buy, until they are pink up to their eyeballs with all the great companies whose pink merchandise donates a portion of profit to research and awareness of the disease. Anyway- that's a whole month, which is great, and truth is I don't really get tired of it.

But what about the 16th? That empty day.

I celebrate Ismaelle.

Ben and I sponsor a little girl from Haiti through World Vision. Ismaelle's birthday is October 16th and all I can hope is that today she has a good day. She loves to play jacks-- and I really hope somebody plays jacks with this sweet girl on her birthday. Ismaelle's name runs through my mind about a hundred times a day. Her name means, "God hears". And I think that couldn't be more perfect for this full and vibrant day when Ismaelle was born 11 years ago.

college roomies

I remember sitting at my computer during my senior year of college thinking, "I will NEVER miss college". I was getting married a week after graduation, our townhouse had gotten broken into by some creepy intruder, I didn't want to make one more latte for a picky Starbucks customer and I was tired of writing papers about conflict resolution. I was just done.

Then, of course, college was over (finally) and now I kind of miss it sometimes. I think I more miss the people than anything else- the late nights up with roommates, sharing snacks and drinking coffee until 2am. You know. I really loved having roommates. There are six of us who lived together somewhere between sophomore and senior year, and some of us lived together all three of those years. I am thankful that even as we are all so busy- some of us have gotten married, moved, are having a baby (!), save lives in the ER, travel all over the place for work- or whatever, but we still try to get together. And it is so easy. Not the planning to get together part, that is difficult, but once we pin down a date and all get together it is easy to sit and laugh for hours with one another.

I have so many great memories from living with these girls in college.

Amanda is so sweet. She and I had a common heart for a clean bathroom. It was an unparalleled connection. She and I also shared a lot of cream cheese and Wheat Thins for lunch.

Chrissy gave me some culture-- and was one of the best listeners, ever.

LP was my first roommate at Salisbury- she always makes me laugh, and she always keeps it real.

Drea has such a heart for people. And she is hilarious. And she is having a baby girl!

Kaley- is well, my Kaley. She and I shared a bunk-bed for two years and it was a sad day when we tore those beds apart.

We wanted of course, to document our visit, especially since Kaley is moving clear across the country soon. Drea and I obviously had trouble with the self-timer at first.

We got it-- but we pretty much gave up on a nice picture of the group!

It was so good to get together with you girls. So good.

the taste of fall

When I returned home from the grocery store, I realized I was the tiniest bit influenced by tasty seasonal items.

hotlanta

Georgia is not a completely foreign place to me, as my aunt and I spent many summers and holidays visiting our friends (who always felt like family). I have not, however, spent a lot of time in Atlanta. My past visits to Atlanta included seeing Ringo Starr in concert (that somewhat forgotten Beatle will always have a special place in my heart) & I flew out of ATL airport with my first and only puppy almost nine years ago-- Rigby was my carry-on.

Anyway, now one of those "family-friends" I mentioned lives in the city, because he grew up to be this amazingly cool guy that travels with rock bands. Ben and I were honored to be invited to he and his sweet fiancee's wedding right smack dab in the middle of the city.

We had a really great time- I think I really like Atlanta. It has tall buildings and a sort of busyness I love, but it also seemed less congested than some cities and had quite a few parks and neighborhoods kind of sprinkled throughout (which Ben liked). Ben even drove in the city and did not want to drive his head into a wall after doing so- growing up on a farm doesn't so much prepare you for the hustle and bustle of city-life.

We were happy to be there with friends and family, and it is always nice to get away for the weekend.

Our hotel was right across from the Fox theatre- where they showed a big red carpet premier of Gone With the Wind in 1939. Since that movie holds my name-sake I figured I should take a picture.

Looking up from the hotel lobby- I just thought it was photo-worthy as well.

So, we got to play some Beatles Rock Band... and let me tell you, it is not easy.

On wedding day, the bride looked very beautiful, of course, and the mother's too. That's my auntie Lo on the left...

And I just couldn't get enough of her sweet blusher-veil.

There was a mashed-potato martini "bar". A-mazing. I'll take 5 please!

We think weddings are fun...

I love time spent with her.

These little ones capture my heart every time.

A very happy couple...

A huge unexpected blessing was the opportunity to see some camp friends that moved to the Atlanta area a few years ago. It was a short but perfect visit. I almost cried a little an hour into our visit anticipating the fact that we would have to say goodbye too soon. But then I decided that was a little ridiculous and we really enjoyed our time together!

In between our hotel check-out and our flight we had some time, so we decided to go to the World of Coca-Cola. It was a pretty entertaining way to spend the afternoon.

You even got to try 20-something different Coke products that are sold around the world. It is too bad you can't really see Ben's face of disgust in this photo, after trying a popular Israeli fountain drink.

I for one, left that place feeling completely brainwashed, like Coca-Cola is the only beverage I will ever drink! Effective marketing, I'd say. My uncle liked it too- especially the 3-D show.

good times had by all!

meet clare

Val and Andrew's little girl was born yesterday, and she & I met today. Clare is so sweet.

In other news:

Two of my most favorite people celebrated 8 years of marriage today, so that's pretty great.

Also, we just got back from a quick visit to Atlanta--

I have much to share later! For now, I must get to bed at a reasonable hour. I am substituting tomorrow- Apparently I'll be teaching the kids multiplying percentages, so Ben and I just went over the material. Let's just say I needed a "refresher". Pathetic...